Saturday, January 4, 2014

Distraction by Reading

I have this stupid struggle with depression and so since it is stupid but real, I have decided to distract myself by reading.....a lot.    The internet gives a person popcorn brain and facebook does not help all that much to distract but rather detracts from my functioning so.......between running away from the internet, at least during most of the day, and whacking away at my 'want to reads' and 'want to read to the kids' agenda, I might be able to keep my mind occupied against the evils lurking at my door with my head.   Sounds like a plan.

Of course reading could add to depression if I read to avoid real life.   Yuck.   The balance is a pain.   Can I handle structured life?   I might be able to remember structured life this week, but maybe I will forget next week?   Who knows.

My last read, "A Tale of Two Cities" was very awesome.   Some say it has too much tedium in the beginning, but I think I just want to reread the beginning so I can connect the dots of all the nuances I missed the first time round.   It took me weeks to find time to read at all so I thought I was just mixed up from forgetting what had already happened.   Perhaps I was just a bit lost.   I highly recommend it for excellent weaving of events and characters.   The Christ like sacrifice was beautifully written and a basic work of art.   Images of the feet walking and walking forward through life and death the sure end to all were rich.   I kind of wonder now if my grandfather was a fan of this book or if he chose the verse for his gravestone from a basic love of the promise it holds.  Perhaps my grandmother chose it.   Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life.[d] Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, 26 and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. John 11: 25 - 26.   Perhaps I will choose this for my gravestone.   I never met my grandfather but feel bonded to him in this verse.   It was a key verse in "A Tale".   Yay Dickens!   There are some of his I want to reread.   

So other than reading and running away from the internet as much as this weakling can manage.....remembering my responsibilities might be helpful too.   Hmmmm........runs away from laptop.   

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