Putting behavior in terms of maturity has been my latest mantra with my maturing children. What does maturing mean? Considering our own behavior in light of how it effects the other person.....I think. Will it make my family's load lighter, then in love for my family I might set the table without being asked. Or I might go change the stinky diaper and not wait to be told.
My current five year old is one to file this sort of information away and think about it and then give me a report on how he is doing currently. It is always a random comment not prompted by me, but rather reported to me. "I am not screaming like I used to Mom." Yay! Happy day! He is considering his behavior. He still has growing up to do but he has learned to reflect at five on his behavior.
If I talk to each of them every so often about this concept of reflecting, then when they are doing whatever they are doing, it might run through their mind to think about it. Asking them how they are doing seems far more effective than telling them how they are doing. Telling them how I am reflecting on my own behavior also is helpful to them I think.
What I want to avoid though is everyone in the family comparing how the other is doing to everyone else. This is when my head might hit the table but we all do this and I tell them so and try to steer them back to what they are responsible for. Parenting is a lot of work. It exhausts and challenges our patience. I am grateful for the sleep I manage to get to recharge my batteries and try again the next day. Pushing myself and then pushing them to keep working on their vocations and run from their entertainment probably should become a sign on my forehead to remind me of what *I* need to do. Run from entertainment. Yes. Sigh. Easier said then done.
Now I am rambling and thinking on how this is entertaining so will now run away.