Monday, October 19, 2015

Vocation as Grandmother

Writing that title surprises me even though she is 17 months old now.  She doesn't live close but as I watch her little self growing and changing I am humbled and amazed by her gift and presence in my life.  She is her parents child.  For me it is a pleasure to watch them bond with her and each other in raising her and in anticipating her younger sibling early next year.  Wow.  

I've puzzled over hearing other grandma's view of their children parenting their grandchildren.  Meddling and sticking one's nose in where it isn't vocationally needed comes to mind.  I try to bear this in mind as I float along with my family.  Acting like adults together I think helps the kids realize that is how they are viewed.  Our own children cease to need monitoring or advice and need more of an open door policy and respect of their choices.  We moms and dads don't have to fix things for them.

I'm writing this bit down while basking in the amazing gift of adult children.  Daughter dear and I enjoy each other.  I enjoy spending time with my son-in-law.  I enjoy my other kids no matter what age.  I enjoy my granddaughter so much. They are all individuals and that relationship of respect began young.  Care and attention shifts and changes.  Even as I revel in my granddaughter I am aching to see my own children.  They are all the individuals God created them to be.

I am having a had time putting into words what it means to cherish each offspring for who they are and to be able to rest in the confidence that they will learn and mature at their own pace and my attempts to put any pressure on them to be people they aren't will not help them as their various vocations change along the way.  Pressure and unwanted advice is mostly patronizing as I look back on some conversations pointed at me as a young person.  I hope that I can hang onto taking an interest in my children's lives which will not invade and harm our relationship.  Respecting the parents is one way I see my role as a grandmother.  Idolizing the grandchild will not help the child.  If my grandchildren want their parents and not me I give thanks.  I love it.  She has been a delight to watch as her parents are a delight to watch while they go about their vocations. Christ has them covered and that is all that is needed.  I love them so and look forward to seeing them again and look forward to the next grand baby and any more I am blessed with in the future.

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